How to Choose the Right Therapist: What to Look For and What to Ask

Starting therapy is a meaningful step toward taking care of yourself or your child. But before you begin, you might be asking, How do I find the right therapist? With so many options and titles (psychologist, psychotherapist, counsellor) it can feel overwhelming to know where to start. The good news is that you do not need to have it all figured out. You just need to know what to look for and what kinds of questions to ask.

This guide will help you understand what makes a therapist a good fit, how to prepare for consultations, and why you are never stuck with someone if it does not feel right.

Why the “Right Fit” Matters

Research shows that one of the strongest predictors of success in therapy is the relationship between the therapist and the client. It does not matter which type of therapy they use if you do not feel safe, respected, or understood when you are with them.

A good therapist creates a space where you or your child can be honest, without pressure to say the “right” thing or hide parts of yourself. This kind of relationship allows growth, real change, and healing to happen.

Before You Book: What to Look For on a Therapist’s Website or Profile

As you search online or browse therapist directories, start by noticing:

• Credentials and qualifications: Are they a registered psychologist, psychotherapist, or social worker? Do they specialize in working with children, trauma, ADHD, autism, anxiety, or the issues you are facing?

• Approach to therapy: Do they describe their style in a way that feels warm, collaborative, and human, or more clinical and professional?

• Who they work with: Adults, parents, children, teens. Neurodivergent individuals. Families.

• How they speak about clients: Do they use language that feels respectful, inclusive, and non-judgmental? Trust how their words make you feel. You should not have to work hard to “fit” into their approach.

Preparing for a Consultation or First Session

Many therapists offer a free or low-cost consultation before you book sessions with them. This is a chance for you to ask questions, get a feel for their personality, and see if you feel comfortable with them.

You might want to think about:

• What you are hoping to get help with.

• What has or has not worked for you or your child in the past.

• Any questions or hesitations you have about starting therapy.

You do not need to share your entire story in the first call. You are simply getting to know each other and seeing how you feel speaking with them.

Questions You Can Ask a Potential Therapist

You are allowed to ask questions. In fact, a good therapist should welcome them. Here are some questions you might ask:

• About Their Experience and Approach

  • How do you typically support people with concerns like mine or my child’s?

  • What does a session with you usually look like?

  • How do you decide on goals or treatment plans with clients?

  • Do you include parents in sessions if a child is the one in therapy?

• About Inclusivity and Neurodiversity

  • How do you adapt your approach for autistic or neurodivergent clients?

  • How do you make therapy inclusive of different backgrounds, cultures, or identities?

• About Communication and Feedback

  • How will I know if therapy is working?

  • What happens if I feel unsure, uncomfortable, or want to make changes to the process?

Green Flags During a First Conversation

Notice how you feel when speaking with them. Some positive signs include:

• You feel listened to instead of rushed or judged.

• They explain things clearly in everyday language.

• They are curious about your experience, not just focused on giving advice.

• They talk about therapy as a team effort, not something they do to you or your child.

• You feel like you could be honest with them, even if it might be hard.

For your child or teen, it might mean they seem calmer, more relaxed, or simply not uncomfortable; that is enough for a first session.

You Are Not Stuck If It Doesn’t Feel Right

Choosing a therapist does not mean you are locked in or stuck forever with that person. Even if you attend a few sessions and something feels off, you are allowed to ask questions, pause, or switch to someone new.

You might say:

• “I’m not sure this approach is the best fit for me.”

• “Can we slow down or try something different?”

• “I’m wondering if there might be someone else who is a better fit.”

A supportive therapist will:

• Listen without taking it personally.

• Thank you for being honest.

• Ask what is not working and explore adjustments.

• Offer referrals or help you transition if you decide to work with someone else.

They will not pressure you to stay, guilt you, or make you feel like you are failing therapy. Your comfort, safety, and autonomy come first.

How It Works at Stillpoint Psychology

We know how important it is to feel comfortable with the therapist you choose. That is why we offer a brief phone consultation before beginning therapy. This is your chance to ask questions, learn about our approach, notice how you feel during that initial conversation, and decide if it feels like the right match for you or your family.

During the first few sessions, we focus on understanding your story, your goals, and what you need to feel supported. We check in regularly and make adjustments together if something is not working. You are never stuck. Therapy should feel collaborative, respectful, and centred on your needs.

Considering Therapy?

If you are looking for a therapist for yourself or your child and want to learn more about our clinicians at Stillpoint Psychology, we are here to help. Reach out to connect with our team or to book a free 15-minute consult to find out if we are the right fit for you.